Even sinners pray

Independence Day.

If you think I am going to take a bath and head out to school and watch the flag hoisting filled with national pride, forget it. It’s not my scene, and I hate politicians and crappy speeches.

If I stay in Bangalore this Independence Day weekend, this is what is going to happen. Radiocity will play Rehman tracks twenty times in three hours. I am sure this year’s favourite track will be “Jai Ho” from the Slumdog Millionaire. There will be an interview with Abhinav Bhindra, the only Indian who won an Olympic gold. Facebook will be full of “I love India” videolinks and photos and fan clubs and people taking the “How Indian are you test?” and the “Which freedom fighter are you?” tests. I am not even going to log into facebook. Then, I’ll have to read about what Independence day means to Prasad Bidappa and his gay pals in Times of India. Read about what our freedom fighters, ok, that sounds too Taliban, I take it back, read what the fathers’ of our nation had envisaged when they sought deliverance from the British. All that juxtaposed with Mayawati’s and Deve Gowda’s contributions to the nation.

I feel so shitty thinking about it, I need a drink.

Drink? I am suddenly reminded of the bloody BJP. They have the national flower, the lotus as their party symbol and all they go about doing is deflowering the state. Perfect.

The BJP spent a lot of money, mostly illegal mining money, to fund their election campaign in Karnataka. Now that they are in power, it’s time to fill up their coffers again. They are going about it sledgehammer in hand. First they cleaned up all the important portfolios. Then the Forest Department to pave the way for some more illegal mining, never bite the hand that feeds, loyal dogs. They are out there to milk every sucker dry. Then they took it literally. Recently they went after the Karnataka Milk Federation (KMF), Karnataka’s answer to Amul. Well, considering they ousted Deve Gowda’s son, I think that was a good thing. So, let’s strike that off the record.

To fund their “budgetary deficit”, you know, money the government spends in the name of infrastructure on contractors who helped them win the elections, they decided to hit the moral high ground. Alcohol. They increased the excise duties on alcohol by a whopping 65%. Sixty five percent. And to make matters worse, local liquor stores demand a 10% premium over and above that because the government has increased the cost of bar licenses.

Fuck.

So, this August 15, I planned to head out to the one place I know where people don’t give a fuck. Pondicherry. It should be, for it was never under British rule. It was ruled by their arch enemy, the French. And the French did the exact opposite of the British. How can they go wrong? I am beginning to like the French. Queen? What queen? They used the guillotine on the last one they had. So, now they have Nicolas Sarkozy. Respect.

I am off to Pondicherry. Liberty Equality and Fraternity. So what if it was the pillars of the French revolution? Its Independence Day and I am in Pondy.

Problem strikes.

This year, Independence day falls on a Saturday. And since, we already have a million holidays in India, we don’t get a compensatory holiday, like the rest of the civilized world. I am pissed off. So, no three day weekend. I can take Friday off but some of my buddies can’t. Crap.

To make matters worse, I am told it could be a “dry day”. A dry-day, my western audience, is a day when all the liquor stores are shut and not allowed to sell booze. Even the restaurants aren’t allowed to sell liquor. It’s a Dry day.

Independence day better not be a dry-day. And there better be nice clean rooms in Pondy. Else the world will witness another freedom struggle.

Please god please, let this Saturday not be a dry day.

Even sinners pray.